Confessions of a messy

I am a messy. Neat-nicks drive me crazy. I admit it. I'm not necessarily proud of it. But it has worked for me for a very, very long time. I think I am a visual person, and I like to see all of my "stuff." What ever the reason, it's who I am.

Today I found the dog chewing on what turned out to be the fingers of a babydoll. Haven't recovered the body yet. But somewhere in my house,  the dog has hidden the evidence. I'm sure we'll stumble over it like some bad scene out of CSI or Criminal Minds...

Baby clutter has me ready to pull out my hair. I admit that, too. Cuz even though I am a messy, I think maybe I had begun a transformation. I'll never be neat. But not minding the big piles is a thing of the past. Perhaps in this area I am finally growing up. I actually covet an empty counter or table top. Sigh...

In the aftermath

I am the first one up this morning. Not very surprising. I don't sleep much anymore. It's been snowing for going on two days straight now, and it's beautiful, and I'm enjoying the time for quiet, peaceful reflection amidst the background of white.

The presents are all opened. Some are strewn about, some are piled up nicely waiting to be dealt with. And really, everyone did a pretty good job on the thoughtfulness aspect of their gifting. While some presents weren't a perfect fit, the thought behind them was.

So now we look forward to a new year. For most of us, there are things in our lives that need to change. Change is paintul. Change is not fun. But, change is what needs to happen. So whether we walk forward of our own accord or are shoved forward is our choice. I think I'm going to try walking on my own.

Ya Gotta Get Up

In slightly over 24 hours, the speakers in our house will be blasting our Christmas tradition - a song whose refrain is, "Ya gotta get up, it's Christmas morning."

I'm ready - mostly. There are presents wrapped and under the tree. The refrigerator is stocked with everything we'll need. (Oops, except for the bacon for breakfast. Where's the dang list so I can write it down?) We have a plan for church and dinner tonight to work around the baby's schedule.

But this year, I feel like my children have mentally moved on. Meredith is spending Chrismas Eve with her significant other and his family. Dana is here physically, but is so stressed under the expectations she's ready to get back to "her" life. Bailey has been mentally oved out since she went to Paraguay three summers ago. That's in a good way. She's always taken charge of her life. And my 18-year-old baby, Adam, is well, an 18-year-old boy. When we assured him that there would not be an X-box under the tree this year as requested, the girlfriend provided it instead.

Don't get me wrong. Good for her for being able to afford to give him such a nice token of her affection. But it also seems to be a symbol of the fact that he no longer looks solely to us for his biggest needs and desires.Not sure that it's good that he's looking to someone else (rather than himself), but he's beginning to look outside his home for that fulfillment. Bittersweet.

So when I hear "Ya gotta get up," blaring over the speakers, in my heart I will be praying that the kids aren't hearing "I gotta get out."

Time flies

So I can't really believe that my last post was in October. Grad school this semester kicked my butt, but in a good way as I just got my final grade. I am now 3/3 in classes, walking away with an A in each of them - as well as a formal acceptance into the KU School of Journalism.

And, we've taken on the role of full-time grandparents. I know why God gave children to the younger set. I love my Jayjay, she is sweet as sugar. But we're both exhausted every night when we go to bed.

Tonight is a company Christmas party for my husband, and it happens to be at the home of a dear, long-time friend. When I tried to go to my company party two weeks ago, the stomach flu hit with a vengeance as I was getting on the highway onramp. Too scared to stick my head out the window, I turned my car into what the car detailing place called a "biohazard." And car detailing places don't have to clean up biohazards, apparently. I'm super happy that we invested in a steam carpet cleaner. It didn't take care of the smell entirely, but it did a good enough job that I can take it back and have the detail place do the full enchilada without giving myself away.

I love my mom. She came to visit for Thanksgiving. We only have a tiny gravy boat, so we used a 4 cup Pyrex measuring cup. The next week she sent me a gravy boat from Crate and Barrel.  I love my mom.

So there's a few weeks before I start my next class - Marketing Research. It's required, so even though it doesn't tickle me, I might as well get it out of the way. But before I do, perhaps I can spend some more time here, between dog walks.