twopooches

Wedding preview

2011-10-02T12:06:00.000-05:00

Getting educated

2011-08-31T11:51:00.001-05:00

I'm doing some research for a class assignment. This video is an interesting video about social media and psychographics..

Johanna Blakely at TED conference

Harry Potter and angst

2011-08-09T00:45:00.001-05:00

The last Harry Potter movie was a great way to spend a couple of hours with my daughter yesterday before she leaves next week to start her first "real" job. In the movie, Harry makes life-and-death decisions for his friends and the wizardry world in which he lives. There's never any doubt as to what he'll do. And true to the previous scripts, though is costs him dearly, Harry eeks out a win in the end.

Harry moves with certainty. Under the toughest conditions he makes the right decisions. I used to be like that. Perhaps age has given me a more shades-of-gray perspective than the black and white of youth. But there are times I long for that simplicity. There is no asking yourself if you made the right decision. There is the decision, its consequences and then you deal with it. When gray is involved, there is doubt, questioning, and worry. Ugh, ugh and more ugh. I'm longing for the days of black and white.

2011-07-14T13:46:00.001-05:00

Dr. Paul Bloom,
Psychologist

Pain hurts more if you believe someone is doing it to you on purpose. - Paul Bloom, TED Global Conference

While I haven't taken the time to investigate the context of this statement, as a random thought, it sure is hitting me where I live today. I'm in the midst of a passive-aggressive, knock-down, drag-out episode with one of my children. I take my share of the blame for the initial incident. She's been really good at pushing my buttons lately, and when I let her do it this time, I said some regrettable things. It could have been resolved within 24 hours. I have reached out multiple times. But we're currently in the midst of the fourth week, and her response every time I reach out is, "I'm not ready to discuss it." Ugh.

Her usual response to pain is to try to resolve it right away. She's the one who wants to flip the switch, get it all on the table and then sweep it into the "resolved" pile. I usually need to stew, to process, to understand why it happened so I can call it finis. Because this is so out of character for her, I’m more and more convinced as the days go by, she is doing this on purpose so I hurt as much as she does. I wish I was the only cause of her pain, but I’m not. The other stuff isn’t something I can fix.

My parental-self doesn’t understand the rejection. The passive-aggressive bull is infuriating. The longer she leaves me to stew, the more I remember the sacrifice, the healing of her wounds, the celebrations of her triumphs, and the just plain love shown to her. The more I stew, the more my perspective turns introspective, and self-pitying.

In the few conversations we’ve had since the incident, she has made it clear she doesn’t want to hear about, much less admit to, the pain and hurt that is her responsibility. I can only hope and pray it is just the hubris and inflexibility of youth talking. But the longer it takes to get to the table to discuss, the deeper I find myself falling into my own perspective hole. I hope when she is ready to talk, she’ll take the ladder she used to climb out of her hole and share it with me. And I pray my eyes will remain open to her pain and perspective as we heal – together.

Neuron insulation

2011-07-01T22:54:00.002-05:00

What the world needs is a big filter. One running between the neurons firing in a person's brain and his or her mouth. There has to be a way to stop said electrical activity from always creeping down the brain stem and escaping through the tongue. Where's a good insulator when you need it?

I've noticed a lot of the sensational news stories today are due to this insulator being missing - whether it's from the person reporting on the story or one of the subjects in it. The latest one I've seen is MSNBC analyst Mark Halpering calling our president a d***. Yes, the nickname for Richard, or more accurately, the euphemism for a male's member. Admittedly, I am not a fan of the president. However, I do view any person who attempts that job with a modicum of respect. Potty mouth does not apply - ever. Anyone who attempts to bear the burdens of that job upon his or her shoulders will not become the subject of trash talk in my conversations. I certainly do not want that job.

I have been known to decommission my filter and fly off the handle with the best (worst?) of them. Certain people have found the buttons I have labored a lifetime to hide, digging with abandon. In the end, nothing gets accomplished for the pusher or the pushed. Nothing is resolved, nothing moves forward, nothing moves into constructive debate. In this context, buttons polarize.The only thing that buttons seem to activate is highly sensitized emotions. Emotion is essential in story telling. But I find debate for the purpose of exchanging ideas is better off without highly-charged emotions. Personally, emotion tends to blind me to reason.

When it comes to marketing, buttons play a different role. Effective marketing requires you connect the audience's emotions with the action you want them to take. Marketers who can't find the buttons won't be able to provoke the desired action, feeling, or response. Five minutes ago I watched a commercial for Worldwide Liquidators. What I remember is "Going, going, gone!" They're pushing my "Don't miss out!" button. I'm not sure what I'm missing out on, but it made me want to know badly enough that I visited their website. In this case, being blinded to reason works to the marketer's advantage.

Motorcyles give me insomnia

2011-06-29T09:28:00.004-05:00

My son has had some overwhelming tragedy in his life this summer. He lost a good friend in a car accident at the beginning of May. Another good friend, who helped Adam get a summer job with her father's construction company, died a week after school got out. A third, Pat, one of his best work-on-landscaping-crew-fishing-hanging-out buddies, was in a motorcycle accident, and has logged a bunch of time in intensive care. Police reports say he was going 110 mph in an urban neighborhood, definitely pushing the limits. He's lost one kidney and most of the function in the other, so it's a pretty sure bet he'll be on dialysis for life. That, in addition to multiple severely broken bones and other assorted internal injuries, ensures that Pat will always live with the repercussions of his reckless decision.

Amazingly, Pat showed up at my house last night. He was on crutches, moving really slowly, with the deliberate speech that gave away high doses of pain medication. Two weeks after nearly losing his life, he was out and about. Except for the crutches and the cast on his leg, you might not have known he was recently close to dead.

It's hard for a 19-year-old to understand the delicate balance of life. My son has had more than his fair share of examples this summer, along with an outright miracle. I hope he doesn't decide to test which category God has put him in.

Medicine is so unpredictable. One minute you're on life support, in intensive care, and then you're out on your own. I know some of this is the work of the insurance company, but the insurance companies wouldn't have much to work with if it wasn't for the miracle of medicine.

Micro communications - micro context?

2011-06-27T14:53:00.000-05:00

Courtesy of brittanywriters.com

The amount that language can be nuanced these days is almost unbelievable to me. Having grown up in a time where writing was a thoughtful, time-intensive effort, usually involving pen, paper and sometimes a stamp, context was almost always a dead give away for overall meaning. Today, where words are dashed off in an e-mail or text message as fast as they cross your mind, readers are more often than not left to infer context, and therefore, meaning. Take for example the difference in the following business e-mail:

Example 1

Please make the changes noted in the attached document.

Thanks.

Example 2

Please make the changes noted in the attached document.

Thanks!

In example 1, I am left wondering what the author is thinking. What was his reaction when he read the document. Was he pleased? Did he hate it? Will I find the draft full of red editor's lashings? What should I be thinking as I open the document? I am left in a sea of ignorance and self-doubt. The need for positive or negative feedback overwhelms me, even before I open it. I want to be prepared for what awaits me.

Example 2 has one single difference, so small that many would overlook it. That difference, an exclamation point, is one that many feel is so overused it is almost meaningless. Exclamation points, I would argue, do have their place in short business communications. Here's why.

In the workplace, e-mail, text messages, instant messages and other short forms of communication have almost entirely replaced longer, more thoughtful missives, and even phone and face-to-face communications. There's no opportunity to read body language, or listen to a thorough explanation of why a business associate has come to a particular conclusion. When you receive hundreds of these communications in a day, learning the art of communicating context in as few characters as possible can not only lead to more concise writing, but also to better business relationships.

In my own workplace, all writing that will be viewed by a prospect or client must be reviewed and approved by our compliance department. Being a part of the sales department, this almost instantly puts me in an adversarial relationship with compliance. It's a government, regulatory thing because we're in the financial industry. So, if I receive example 1 as a response to a writing submission I make to the compliance department, I almost always read it with a negative overtone. To me, a period implies no inflection, no emotion. There's nothing there on which to evaluate not only the work, but the relationship with the particular editor who wrote it. Example 2, on the other hand, by the inclusion of the exclamation point, leads me to think the compliance editor, at the very least, appreciated the effort I put into it as well as the effort it will take to edit it. While I still have to wait to open the document to see the evaluation, I can at least know the person took a millisecond to think about adding punctuation that would give me context. Since there's no tone of voice or body language in e-mail (or text, or instant message), punctuation is one of the few opportunities we have to give the reader context.

So e-mail me, text me, instant message me, I don't care. Just don't forget to use punctuation that gives me context. (At least I didn't get into emoticons.)

Wote - not just a town in Kenya

2011-06-17T14:48:00.003-05:00

Hello, my name is Cindy, and I am a ranter. This has been a recent revelation, and I have decided to embrace it. I haven't yet decided if there's a 12-step program that would aid me with this issue. No matter.

Grammar was the target of my last rant, along with its cousin, proofreading. I was harsh, maybe too much so. From the elevated status of my soap box, I did feel empowered. However, I saw a piece of writing this week that made me think twice about my distaste for grammar.

katrich.wordpress.com

In a resume for a writing position in my department at work, we found one in need of some well-placed commas. And then came this sentence starter: "I wote several articles..." Wote gets a squiggly red salute from Microsoft Word. I'm sure if this person ran spellcheck it would have been caught. Research seemed to be the best solution to see if the person had a reason for adding the word wote to the Word dictionary. Here's what I found:

Wote, capitalized, is a town in Kenya. It is southwest of Nairobi, and sits on the edge of the desert. An unlikely culprit. This person was so white (a picture was included on the resume), unless Wote is the location of a foster child he or she sends money to through a children's charity, it's probably not the cause of the error.
WOTE, all capitalized, is an acronym for Workshop on Trustworthy Elections, an educational seminar put on by the International Association for Voting Systems Sciences. Again, based on the briefest of glances at the experience listed in the resume, I just don't see it.
wote.com is the location on the World Wide Web of Write on the Edge. It is a technical communications company. This sounds more promising. Perhaps this person was a freelance writer for Write on the Edge. Now I have the reason to give him or her the benefit of the doubt.

What ever the case, back to the rant. In an admittedly shallow search of Google, I could not find wote used as a verb. And the number of times I had to stop and divide the sentences in this resume into manageable chunks was frustrating. So perhaps my problem with grammar stems from a few things:

I have a naturally affinity for language. Subject and meaning still interest me more than grammar, but this resume made me stop and think about the importance of underlying structure. My ear for the natural ebb and flow of language allows me to use grammar somewhat innately, though the details plague me. I would cast it as similar to gross and fine motor skills. I am definitely gross-oriented.
Second, I am a global thinker. Big picture, big picture, big picture. Say it with me. Big picture. Grammar is definitely on the picky detail side of the picture.
My attention is generally focused on what comes next, not what I've already done. For me, the adrenaline rush comes with the creation of meaningful content. Once I've got the meaning on paper, I would just as soon leave the details behind and find the next big thing. I get caught up in the rush to move on.

I have had people tell me to just slow down (yawn) and I will do better. As I will be entering the sixth decade of my life in a few short weeks, I'm thinking not so much. A better approach might be to pick up a few more tools here and there so I can do it right the first time, rather than being hauled back to revisit it again. That, and I'm still looking for a good proofreader to call my friend.

Woe is I, with apologies

2011-06-12T14:07:00.001-05:00

Patricia T. O'Conner and
her husband, Stewart Kellerman.
From www.grammarphobia.com

I will begin with apologies to Patricia T. O'Conner. I don't know her. I'm sure she's a lovely person. However, in this, and the next few posts, I may have less than kind things to say about grammar, even though she's written a well-respected book about it (Woe is I). Some have even called her book, "Invigorating and entertaining..." (Publishers Weekly). Really? I believe those are two words are as antithetical to grammar as any in the English language.

I really want to like grammar. Apparently, having good grammar is a quality that makes me credible as a writer. Perhaps. If so, then I guess my goal will be to always have a really good proofreader by my side. But I think credibility for writers is so much more than grammar. Credibility is about making your meaning understood with the words you choose. And by meaning, I mean the ability for a writer to do things like bring the reader into a different reality; let readers in on an inside joke; bring the most iron-souled reader to tears without completely understanding why; keep the reader coming back for more. Grammar has its use in the world of writing, to be sure. But does anybody really CARE whether I used a commas or semicolons as separators when I was listing how I defined making meaning understood earlier in this paragraph? I know what my answer is.

Much to Ms.O' Conner's credit, it appears that even she agrees that some rules are antiquated. Her second-to-last chapter, "The Living Dead: Let Bygone Rules Be Gone" gives me some hope. After skimming the chapter, while I agree with most of them, I'm sure the English majors (for whom I work) will laugh out loud, and I'll still get the nasty red marks on my papers. (Heavy sigh.)

So, Ms. O'Conner, I'm sure you've had to overcome your doubters, and I will join their ranks. I hope you persuade me to see grammar as amusingly as you seem to. Then, perhaps, I will begin to care more about it.

Embracing my reality competition persona

2011-06-09T21:42:00.003-05:00

I must admit, when the "Survivor" reality television show first came out, I was not impressed. Half-naked, dirty, greedy, back-stabbing people were not attractive to me. Nothing about them reached out and hooked me. Nothing about them made me want to be there, either in reality or in my imagination. I can't imagine how it's stayed on the air since 1992. Obviously, I am not the target audience.

www.bravotv.com/top-chef-masters

So when I look at my television viewing habits today, I find myself quite surprised by what's on my DVR. "Top Chef Masters," "Project Runway," "America's Got Talent," and "The Voice." And I've been occasionally caught watching a marathon showing of "America's Next Top Model." (Shhh!) So why have I gone whole-heartedly to the dark side?

The answer isn't brain surgery. I can just see myself in each and every one of those shows. I fancy myself a good cook, so I could be a chef if I really wanted to. I can sew, so why couldn't I show in New York fashion week? I love to sing, so why couldn't I win a million dollars? And, of course, I'm secretly a skinny super model in my mind. The common denominator of all these scenarios is me.

Just as in reality television, in writing, the ability for readers to see themselves as a part of the scenario is critical to setting an emotional hook. Finding the right words to make the readers envision themselves in the story you're trying to tell is the difference between forgettable and memorable; action or inaction; the feeling of indifference - or yes - even passion. I suppose that's why the advice I most often hear for writers is, "Write what you know." Drawing on experience also allows a writer to draw on their own emotion and insights, as well as observations of the others involved in the situation. And while I find writers to be extremely creative, I think experience helps you be believable.

Handy Inspiration

2010-04-19T16:59:00.002-05:00

My neighbor and walking friend is a very handy person. So handy in fact that she started a blog about it. She inspired me to fix my house numbers because she did, too. We painted our house six or seven years ago, and the painter broke the numbers, then painted them a color that didn't contrast enough before he put them back up. She had recently replaced her house numbers, so Saturday morning we took an hour and she helped me do mine...

First I had to pry off the old numbers. They just had tiny nails holding them on, so I found a platic putty knife, inserted it underneath and started to pry. Of course, the plastic wasn't particulary effective, so I had to find an alternative. Being unable to locate the metal putty knives, I did manage to find a chisel and a pliers. Between the two, it seemed to do the trick.

When I laid the numbers out on the ground, it seemed like about 1.5" was the right amount of space between them. They are a bit bigger than the old numbers, so I started them a little higher than where the old ones started. I marked a center spot on the beam at the height where I wanted the first number to go. The new numbers use tiny screws instead of nails. Fortunately the first number is a "1", so the hole in the number for the screw actually falls on the center line of the beam where it was being installed. I held up the number, marked the bottom hole (the one has a screw at the top and the bottom), used a level to make sure that the numbers were even, and drilled pilot holes for both numbers.

Once the pilot holes were drilled, I switched the bit on the drill for a screw bit an screwed on the number "1". I walked back to the street to look at my handywork, and it didn't look straight. Sigh... So lesson learned. Screw in the top screw, then look at positioning before you screw in the second screw. It's definitely a two person job. I'm glad I had my friend to help. So we unscrewed the bottom, repositioned, redrilled a pilot holed, and reattached the screw.

The rest of the numbers were a little more difficult, as the screw holes weren't at the center of the numbers. I'm sure that's so they don't warp over time. But it did make the task of getting it lined up on the center of the beam a bit more difficult. So we measured the distance between the numbers, and marked it on center. Then we held it up and eyeballed it straight to mark the top pilot hole, drilled it and screwed it in, then eyeballed it straight again before putting in the second screw. It took a bit of jiggling back and forth, but the total project ended up taking about an hour.

So now, thanks to the inspiration and help of Handy Granny, I have new house numbers that can easily be seen from the street. And the goldfinches in the tree next to the front door will know they've found their way home.

Early bird walkin'

2010-04-11T09:17:00.003-05:00

Getting well into middle age has has its pleasures and its issues. One of the issues I've been dealing with lately is some pretty severe lower back pain. I've been seeing a chirpractor since early February with mixed results.

We finally decided I should go in for x-rays to see if there was a reason that the results have been so hit and miss. The good news is that there's nothing serious. But as usual, my body is not factory-spec, either. Two things are probably giving me the most issues. First, my lowest vertebrae is mostly fused to my tailbone. And probably the biggest culprit is that the final nerve canal at the base of the vertebrae is significantly smaller than the other ones, and is likely pinching on the nerves that are causing me the most pain.

So what's the cure? There really isn't one, but there are things you can do to relieve pressure. And of course number one on the list is lose weight. Seems the answer to every issue in my life is to lose weight. So on the days that I am in less pain, I have started pulling myself out of bed to walk a couple of miles before the work day starts with my neighbor, Handy Granny. Handy Granny has come up with a great idea on exercise. Instead of hiring repairmen to do the chores around her house, she is doing them herself. She moves more, and gets exercise at the same time. Go Granny!

Some days I'm in better shape than others to walk, but she brings me coffee and we go at my pace. I managed four out of five days this past week. When we're done, I'm up and ready to get going with my day. And like Handy Granny, I'm moving more.

Kitty jealousy

2010-04-07T20:39:00.001-05:00

So why do pooches get all the glory? I want a blog, too.
-Princess

Twopooches pose

2010-03-29T05:00:00.004-05:00

Meredith came home last weekend to take pictures for a project that I am working on, and the pooches decided they wanted to get in on the action. Who am I to stop them? I just want to say that Meredith is one of the best photographers I know for capturing the essence of a person, or in this case pooch. Ginger is definitely inquisitive, and Gizmo is a worrier. Well done, Meredith.

So Meredith and her beau are getting ready to graduate their masters programs at college, and are making plans for the next phase of their lives. While there are no final decisions yet, it looks like it may involve a move that is at least a full-day's drive away. If it should come to pass, this will be the first time she will be so far away. Right now school is a quick one hour drive away from home.

Meredith, God bless her, works everything out by talking. If there's a thought in her head, it comes out of her mouth. Completely lacking in a filtering system. She knows it, too. So when you tune her out for a short period during one of her longer discourses, she's not offended. Thank goodness she has developed some thick skin! When they were over today she and Lorin were discussing the merits of the city they're contemplating during dinner. I was late (running another sibling to an appointment just as dinner started...sigh), and managed to get in, eat my entire dinner, take my dishes to the sink, and exit the kitchen before the two of them came up for air. When I need to, I've learned to hold my own in a conversation at this house. But poor Josh (the beau) is a man of few words. Meredith certainly makes up for it! I guess that helps make it a good match.

So if you need a good photographer, or are just needing someone who can hold up their end of the conversation, I certainly recommend Meredith.

Being a Good Guesser

2010-03-17T09:26:00.001-05:00

In an article called 5 Things Every Real Marketer Knows Today on Open Forum, John Jantsch, owner of Duct Tape Marketing says, "Marketing Planning is Guessing." He goes on to say that the primary purporse of creating a marketing plan is that you must go through a process to do it.

Guessing generally has a negative connotation. You guess when you don't know something. I think guessing is about asking questions. People who don't ask questions don't have the curiosity you need to grow your business. But if you do it right, the questions you uncover during your marketing planning should make you do the research. Once you do the research, then you don't have to guess. Need more info on what your market is? Do a market analysis. Who is your best customer? Do a customer analysis. Are you collecting information from your existing customers? Give them a reason to share their info with you. Then your plan should include activities to get to know them better. Where are your best leads coming from? Not sure? Make a plan for tracking them. Better data will allow you to provide outstanding service to your best customers and figure out who else is out there that could benefit.

So marketing planning as guessing? I would rather look at it as finding out what you don't know so you make a plan to know it, then act on it.

Character approved

2010-03-15T11:01:00.000-05:00

I love USA Network's Character Approved campaign. It's all about people who aren't afraid to buck the system and follow their dreams. I am happy to say I have an acquaintance that I would be happy to nominate for a Character Approved award.

Steve DiFranco is a guy I met because my boss didn't have enough time to meet with him. He's in sales, so I always look at those initial meetings and conversations with a grain of salt, because I knew he wanted something from me. But he was so genuine and his attitude was so appealing, from that point forward his call is one of the few sales calls that I would take every time.

I got to have lunch Steve last week. And in that hour, I found that the positive, genuine attitude was born out of a terrible, terrible childhood. I'm not sure he would want me to share all the details here, but suffice it to say that he grew up in a place where fear and terror were never far from his mind. He grew up in a place where people lied to him because they could. He grew up believing that he wasn't allowed to go to college because he grew up in the wrong neighborhood. Not just it would be hard. He truly thought he wasn't allowed. And his memories of it all seem strikingly clear.

The amazing thing is that as he spoke, I could tell that the spark of the spirit of joy, love and wonder at life that I know as Steve seems to have been there through his whole life. He speaks of those times with no bitterness. He seems to genuinely understand that the blessings he has in his life right now, who he is right now, are due at least in some part to being molded by the fires that he came through in his early years. If only I had that strength of character.

Steve told me that people have told him that there is a book in his life story. I hope that should he ever be ready to write it, that he would allow me the honor of putting his story in words.

Coralling Amoeba

2010-03-04T01:12:00.001-06:00

The past few days I have felt like I've been chasing the oozing edges of my life. I can't really decide if it's good or bad. I am still really excited about this new direction in my career and in my life. When I think about where I was a week ago, all I can do is smile at the change. So next step is to give some definition to those edges that tend to get away - bring some focus. It's fun to ooze for a while. But I do need some control over where I go.

Trickle, slip and slowly slide
Across the surfaces of today and tomorrow.
Always free yet still contained -
Creating, growing, ever changing.
Defined but free to become.

The Scratchy Mess of Desperation

2010-02-26T21:27:00.002-06:00

It is amazing the tales you will tell yourself when you are desperate. Come to think of it, "tale" is maybe too tame of a word. Yesterday, the wool I had pulled over my eyes about my job for the past several months was finally and fully yanked off. True, the moths had been eating away at it and the truth had begun to be evident. But the feeling of being free of the itchy, uncomfortable mess was something akin to walking into an air-conditioned room after taking a long jog in July in the hot, humid south.

The details are not particularly relevant. But the lesson learned is. Be passionate about what you do and it doesn't matter how hard you have to work. Passion carries you through the hard work and even gives your work a life of its own. So I am resolved to move forward in which ever direction I go with my career and do it with passion.

Downshift to idle

2010-02-05T20:22:00.001-06:00

It's Friday so it's time to downshift to the idle gear. I'm pooped, fatigued, ragged, frazzled, drained and just plain sucked dry. It's the weekend and I'm ever-so-glad.

One of the characters on the TV show playing in the background just said, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten." I'm sure I should do the reseach so I can attribute it to the wise person who said it, but I'm just out of gas. But it's so relevant to this post that I've been planning in my head all day. In some areas of my life I've known that the fit has not been perfect - the gears have been grinding together. And perhaps it's to the point where there's not enough left on some of the teeth to hold things together. I need a new gear or two in my life. The focus on getting new gears has become more than a priority. Now it's a necessity.

So the old heap is parked in the garage for the weekend, getting some rest. We'll get back on the road soon enough, searching for new gears.

Straight to the pants

2010-01-22T16:46:00.002-06:00

The very first thing I do after work is run to my bedroom, strip off my business casual attire, and jump straight into my old sweat pants. To a certain degree I am shedding my day and leaving it in the past. But the best part is that I'm plunging headlong into the known. My old sweat pants never tell me I'm wrong and never judge or criticize. As many times as I'm being lazy when I wear them, I have the paint stains to prove that I accomplish things when I'm in them. I always resent it on the nights when I have plans and can't go straight to sweatpants.

This got me to thinking about familiarity and avoidance. Even though they seem to be very different on the emotional meter, they often go hand-in-hand. We embrace the familiar in order to avoid negatives in our lives. But at some point, when we live too often with the familiar, our image deteriorates, getting old and stained and sweaty. What we originally convinced ourselves was shedding the past may really be fear of the unknown. There is a fulcrom in there somewhere - the balance tips and the recluse in us gains control.

Recluse scares me a little. But I'm not giving up my sweatpants.

Nuclear Waste Management

2010-01-14T21:45:00.002-06:00

Cross my heart, I believe that nuclear waste management is an important environmental issue. Those little radioactive isotopes can contribute so much to our lives, it behooves us to figure out a safe way to deal with them once we're done with them. But I must admit to being slightly bewildered when I received the following instructions earlier this week at the doctor's office where I went to have some nuclear imaging studies:

"We're going to start an IV, and inject some isotopes so we can take some pictures. After you receive the injection, we'll need to wait about 30 minutes for it to travel through your body. If you need to use the restroom during that time, please be sure to use the one in our office, as your urine will be radioactive, and we have to follow special protocols to contain it."

Hmm. What can one possibly say to that except to nod with your gaze slightly lowered in a moment of slight embarassment. Having come of age in the era of "China Syndrome," "Silkwood" and Three Mile Island, I understand the negative connotations of radioactive contamination all too well. I have since found out that the amount of radiation I received is equivalent to an x-ray. Teeny-tiny and reportedly quite safe. But somehow I never imagined that I would be considered a purveyor of nuclear waste, or require special protocols to deal with my pee.

So people's opinions about nuclear technology are generally not ambivalent. Black and white, for or against, yea or nay. But I find myself strangely caught over the divide. I certainly don't want to contribute to the contamination of the planet, but I also want to be able to use the best available technologies to ensure my health. Or to create electricity for my home. Or what ever it is. I have no idea how well nuclear imaging offices are equiped to deal with radioactive body waste. Truly, I hope someone did their homework on that before they started injecting those of us with the pains that can so cause you to take stock of life.... and pee.

A pain-in-the-scapula

2010-01-07T23:44:00.000-06:00

On Tuesday I had a pain just under my left scapula. It didn't just poke me and leave. It moved in and stabbed me repeatedly for over an hour before it forced me to pay attention. And for the next 10 hours it was my constant companion. Of course, being the excellent student that I am, pain near the heart gave me much reason to pause and reassess.

In this moment, many people will have the life-flashed-before-my-eyes experience. Personally I was too busy trying not to scream in agony to get that dramatic. But God did get my attention, primarily about the boo-hoo pity me attitude that has been more prevalent in my thoughts in recent days.

I hate resolutions, they always seem to set me up for failure. But we're close enough to the beginning of the new year to say that this event has caused me to resolve to change my way of thinking about my life. Everyone has challenges. Ignoring them doesn't make them go away. If I can't change the situation, I can certainly make the best of it.

Meanwhile, my regular doc seems to think it was muscle-related rather than anything more serious. (Of course he's ordered a bunch of expensive tests to make sure...) So I will pick this old body up and try to stay away from sharp-pointy-painful things.

Channeling Aretha

2010-01-03T00:41:00.002-06:00

Today Aretha Franklin is in my head. She even slipped out of my mouth at one point. One of the subjects that Aretha is most famous for is respect. when you mention her name, it's the song most of us think of immediately.

So why am I thinking about respect? Well, I did capture the picture you're looking at on my new camera. I love my pooches, and Gizmo has more forebearance than is reasonable to expect.

Curfews are a sore subject at our house right now. With an 18-year-old high school senior in the house, any kind of rules tend to chafe. He missed his curfew on New Year's Eve (1 a.m, by the way) by four minutes. According to him, he was "hitting all the red lights." Plausible, and even likely. However, instead of calling me on the phone we have given him, he just showed up late. And because the number of minutes was so small, he didn't think that it should be counted as being late. At 1:05 a.m. I declined to discuss it further. But today when he asked to have his regular curfew extended, I told him no. Not a popular decision, I have to tell you. And I told him it was because he didn't respect me.

Now he is the baby of the family, and I'm sure that I've treated him as such on more than one occasion. But I hope before he leaves the house in May to make the foray into the college world, he understands that respecting someone means that even in the small things, your actions take the other person into account. Our goal has been to raise our chilren to be self-sufficient, and that they are. But life doesn't happen in isolation, either. At some point they have to learn to put other's needs in the same neighborhood as their own.

And don't worry. Gizmo had to endure the headband only about as long as it took to take the picutre. Thank you, Giz.

Confessions of a messy

2009-12-30T23:37:00.000-06:00

I am a messy. Neat-nicks drive me crazy. I admit it. I'm not necessarily proud of it. But it has worked for me for a very, very long time. I think I am a visual person, and I like to see all of my "stuff." What ever the reason, it's who I am.

Today I found the dog chewing on what turned out to be the fingers of a babydoll. Haven't recovered the body yet. But somewhere in my house, the dog has hidden the evidence. I'm sure we'll stumble over it like some bad scene out of CSI or Criminal Minds...

Baby clutter has me ready to pull out my hair. I admit that, too. Cuz even though I am a messy, I think maybe I had begun a transformation. I'll never be neat. But not minding the big piles is a thing of the past. Perhaps in this area I am finally growing up. I actually covet an empty counter or table top. Sigh...

In the aftermath

2009-12-26T08:01:00.001-06:00

I am the first one up this morning. Not very surprising. I don't sleep much anymore. It's been snowing for going on two days straight now, and it's beautiful, and I'm enjoying the time for quiet, peaceful reflection amidst the background of white.

The presents are all opened. Some are strewn about, some are piled up nicely waiting to be dealt with. And really, everyone did a pretty good job on the thoughtfulness aspect of their gifting. While some presents weren't a perfect fit, the thought behind them was.

So now we look forward to a new year. For most of us, there are things in our lives that need to change. Change is paintul. Change is not fun. But, change is what needs to happen. So whether we walk forward of our own accord or are shoved forward is our choice. I think I'm going to try walking on my own.

Ya Gotta Get Up

2009-12-24T06:09:00.003-06:00

In slightly over 24 hours, the speakers in our house will be blasting our Christmas tradition - a song whose refrain is, "Ya gotta get up, it's Christmas morning."

I'm ready - mostly. There are presents wrapped and under the tree. The refrigerator is stocked with everything we'll need. (Oops, except for the bacon for breakfast. Where's the dang list so I can write it down?) We have a plan for church and dinner tonight to work around the baby's schedule.

But this year, I feel like my children have mentally moved on. Meredith is spending Chrismas Eve with her significant other and his family. Dana is here physically, but is so stressed under the expectations she's ready to get back to "her" life. Bailey has been mentally oved out since she went to Paraguay three summers ago. That's in a good way. She's always taken charge of her life. And my 18-year-old baby, Adam, is well, an 18-year-old boy. When we assured him that there would not be an X-box under the tree this year as requested, the girlfriend provided it instead.

Don't get me wrong. Good for her for being able to afford to give him such a nice token of her affection. But it also seems to be a symbol of the fact that he no longer looks solely to us for his biggest needs and desires.Not sure that it's good that he's looking to someone else (rather than himself), but he's beginning to look outside his home for that fulfillment. Bittersweet.

So when I hear "Ya gotta get up," blaring over the speakers, in my heart I will be praying that the kids aren't hearing "I gotta get out."

Time flies

2009-12-18T16:30:00.000-06:00

So I can't really believe that my last post was in October. Grad school this semester kicked my butt, but in a good way as I just got my final grade. I am now 3/3 in classes, walking away with an A in each of them - as well as a formal acceptance into the KU School of Journalism.

And, we've taken on the role of full-time grandparents. I know why God gave children to the younger set. I love my Jayjay, she is sweet as sugar. But we're both exhausted every night when we go to bed.

Tonight is a company Christmas party for my husband, and it happens to be at the home of a dear, long-time friend. When I tried to go to my company party two weeks ago, the stomach flu hit with a vengeance as I was getting on the highway onramp. Too scared to stick my head out the window, I turned my car into what the car detailing place called a "biohazard." And car detailing places don't have to clean up biohazards, apparently. I'm super happy that we invested in a steam carpet cleaner. It didn't take care of the smell entirely, but it did a good enough job that I can take it back and have the detail place do the full enchilada without giving myself away.

I love my mom. She came to visit for Thanksgiving. We only have a tiny gravy boat, so we used a 4 cup Pyrex measuring cup. The next week she sent me a gravy boat from Crate and Barrel. I love my mom.

So there's a few weeks before I start my next class - Marketing Research. It's required, so even though it doesn't tickle me, I might as well get it out of the way. But before I do, perhaps I can spend some more time here, between dog walks.

In the elements for the gridiron

2009-10-11T07:55:00.000-05:00

I saw two football games this week. Fortunately, though both involved some nasty cold and one involved relentless rain, both of my favored teams were victorious.

Thursday night (because of a lack of high school stadium space) my son played an away game against a very evenly matched team. It started out as a cool and crisp night. I was on the sidelines taking pictures as usual. Then a fine mist begin trickling down. At first I could keep my camera out, but soon the fine mist became insistent.and it had to hibernate under my jacket. The game was more exciting than a parent would want. It went into overtime (in the cold and the rain). We held them to a field goal on their attempt, and we scored a touchdown, thus ending with the win. There are a lot more details exciting only to me and the rest of our team, but I will spare you the motherly bragging.

Yesterday was a girls at the gridiron day with my friend Laura M. Her husband is works for the Corp of Engineers, and is currently serving a tour of duty in Afghanistan. Yesterday she invited me to use the second of their two season tickets to our beloved KU game. She is an alumni, and someday (knock on wood) I will be too. We bundled up, but not enough, and were extra chilly when it was over. The brisk walk back, with one good uphill stage really helped get the blood pumping.

So I like football. Not crazy-like, but really enjoy like. I don't spend hours on stats or armchair quarterbacking. I can tell when the teams are doing well, and when they're not. And since my son plays, I've made a concerted effort to understand more about the positions. All of which should help me to be a lifetime fan.

Ok so that was pretty boring. Hope you stayed awake enough to find an NFL game on your TV. I am aff to the library to write a paper for next week. Ugh.

Ugh...

2009-10-09T22:24:00.000-05:00

Today at work we celebrated ugh. Our boss will be travelling during the Hallmark Bosses Day holiday, so we celebrated early. In honor of her love of the word "Ugh," we got her a stamp that said same. She can't wait to use it. Oh, joy. So in honor of my boss, things that could be awarded the word ugh:

Barak Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize. (Obviously I'm having a tough time getting over this.)
People who are too proud to admit they made a mistake.
Lima beans
Baby barf
Garage band screamers
Teenagers with low blood sugar
Whining
Really, whining
Passive aggressive people
Mucus

You get the picture, don't you?

Really? Seriously?

2009-10-09T21:57:00.000-05:00

Barak Obama won the Nobel Prize for peace. Seriously? After just nine months in office? One newscast I heard today said that he was barely in office when the nominations were due. I've never been interested in how a Nobel laureate was nominated, but I've totally lost respect for the Nobel Prize institution.

Haven't lost it

2009-05-20T13:56:00.002-05:00

I was relieved to find out yesterday that I haven't lost the academic touch. I got the grade from my first graduate class yesterday and am walking away with an A, or 12 quality points. Now I haven't been able to boast a 4.0 for a very long time, and admittedly it's a bit of a stretch to claim it after one class. However, since my perspective on life is from the perch of the latter stages of my fifth decade, I am going to do all the bragging and celebrating that I can. Yay me!

Debut Day

2009-05-04T19:05:00.005-05:00

Jayden Nicole Olsen arrived on Monday, May 4. She weighs 8lbs 2 oz, and is 19.5 inches long. Mom and baby are doing great. (More pictures to come.)

The scariest part was after her head was out, the doctor had to unwrap the cord from around her neck before he could deliver the rest of her. Her hands and feet were pretty blue for a while. But they ended up pinking up nicely.

Getting used to it

2009-03-09T14:18:00.005-05:00

I can't hide any longer. In approximately 6 weeks I will be a grandmother. Meet Jayden Nicole:

While she is unexpected, she will be deeply loved.

Social Mooovers

2009-02-26T23:45:00.004-06:00

My new career is in the dairy industry. While I am part of the 98% of the population who has been raised off of the farms, in the last four months I have learned that dairy farmers have an impressive story to tell. Since I work in the communications department, I am excited to find new ways to help us non-farmers understand the dairying experience.

Farming is physically demanding. Dairying is a volatile industry, so dairy farmers have to be great businessmen as well as part economist. They also love the land and their animals, and work hard to understand agriculture and veterinary issues so they can keep their herds healthy, happy, and well-fed.

I was checking out some links on YouTube, and discovered one that made me smile:

I think those are the cleanest cows I have ever seen outside of photoshop...

Education seduction

2009-02-09T22:31:00.004-06:00

Nights like tonight make me happy. After 25 years, I have returned to the educational arena to pursue my masters degree in Marketing Communications. The first class I am taking is called, "Leadership and Management in Marketing Communications." The discussion is fulfilling, and I can't wait to return each week.

New starts

2009-01-10T17:05:00.002-06:00

I am excited to start grad school in a couple of weeks. A new challenge is always a good way to keep things in life interesting. I love my new job, and I am hoping that the skills that new knowledge brings me will finally allow me to move beyond "project manager" in my career. Project manager is a fine and valid position, but after being a mom of 4 , and being married for 25 years, project management is something I can do in my sleep.

If all goes well, I think I will be taking a class this summer in Susainability Communications. I a super excited about that. Even though I am not a classic environmentalist, I really believe that it is the direction that we need to move as individuals, communities, and nations. My company has a sustainability division (current staffing is 1, I believe), and I think if the class goes well, it might be a real option to pursue.

rambling

2008-12-02T16:06:00.005-06:00

Thanksgiving was yummy. Still have lots of leftovers (we cooked 2 turkeys, 2 breasts and 10 lbs of potatoes for 6 people... we love turkey) that will hit the freezer today or tomorrow. Little pockets of yumminess for the cold winter to come.

Speaking of winter, we had our first snows of the season over the weekend. Just enough to leave the landscape fresh and clean, but not enough to require snowplows. Perfect. More snow scheduled for tomorrow...

Ate a yummy veggie muffaletta on Sunday when I took bakery-owner-wannabe daughter back to college. She took me to her favorite lunch place (my treat of course). She had an incredible grilled cheese that had fresh basil and basil pesto and a bunch of other wonderful stuff on some incredible bread. Bread definitely is the most important piece of a grilled cheese. No combination of wonderful ingredients can be good without a great base to put it on.

Only son went hunting for ducks on Sunday. He shot one but through a series of unfortunate events gave it to one of his hunting buddies. Duck in the turkey fryer would have been interesting.

Last summer (June 27 to be exact) we refiled our 2006 income taxes, as we claimed a cash gift we received as income when we shouldn't have. We even listed it as a cash gift when we originally filed. But the IRS didn't have the decency to tell us. So once we found out we refiled, and the check finally arrived yesterday. Now I should be able to pay my Christmas bills.

Another basketball game to watch tonight for basketball daughter. Thinking good shooting and rebounding thoughts her way.

So

2008-11-26T14:41:00.004-06:00

So it's interesting learning a new job. Well not so much a new job as a new industry - agriculture. Specifically dairy. Did you know cows udders can be lopsided? Who knew? And only certain types of cows are dairy cows? I marveled at the thought! When my boss asks me if a certain picture looks ok, I say of course, only to learn my dairy-neophyte status has yet again been reinforced. Too skinny... cows with brown spots are a genetic anomaly... and of course we never want to show cows with dirt on them, or cows with (heaven forbid) flies buzzing around. So closing out my first full month of my new job, I can honestly say it challenges my brain and I learn something new every day. And the "newbie" look that everyone shoots me once in a while isn't condescending. So far I really like everyone I am working with.

So holiday time. I suppose I should touch on that. We are again taking to the southern tradition of deep fried turkey for Thanksgiving. It keeps spouse busy and out of the kitchen. My aspiring bakery-owner-child is at home now whipping up some yummy rolls from scratch. I have about six vegetable peelers (because I could never find one when I needed one), so we can all sit around the table peeling potatoes in the morning because everyone insists that using flakes means it's not really Thanksgiving. That leaves pies, green bean casserole and sweet potatoes. I think graphics daughter will be taking care of one or more of those. Am I a good delgator or what?

So I am a little bit sad that basketball daughter isn't going to make it home. I sure hope she doesn't spend it alone like she was talking about. Thanksgiving is for families, whether they're your own, or you're just adopting...

So I am making plans to get professional pictures done of our family. It's all my mom has asked for for the last three years... sigh. It's expensive, but I think it might be one of the last chances we have to do this.

Once again employed, I contemplate

2008-11-12T09:42:00.004-06:00

Having passed the perpetual panic of unemployment, I seem to have time to go back to some of the more esoteric thoughts of life.

One of the significant people in my life doesn't seem to be able to fathom my longing for a conflict-free personal life, so I have been thinking a lot about why. Here are some of my initial thoughts:

Conflict takes energy. I do not see myself as an energetic person, and in fact, I usually have an energy deficit just performing my normal day-to-day responsibilities. I covet personal time with my family and friends to recharge, not deplete me.
I fulfill any need for conflict virtually these days. And mostly what I mean by that is reality TV. When this phenomenon first appeared on our tv in the form of "Survivor", I thought it was really dumb. But I find myself getting caught up in the ones where I can actually imagine myself (in another life) as a competitor - Top Chef, Project Runway, a lot of the Bravo, career-specific ones. (Believe me, running around in a remote location is NOT my thing.) I can imagine myself in the place of the chefs, designers, decorators, and even the rich housewives. Their conflict becomes my conflict, neatly resolved at the end of the season, if not the end of the episode. My desire for the mental stimulation that my amigo craves is fulfilled through the TV screen. I don't need it live.
Conflict can be stimulating, but the negative is that in this day and age of limited restraint of expression, it can and most often is painful. Even playing the "devil's advocate" (in my experience) often devolves into personal insult wrapped up in intellectual proposition. Either we no longer have the thick skin of our forebearers who spoke for hours on end at debates in front of large crowds, or we no longer have the ability to edit what we say and do. I prefer to avoid hurting people.

Musing for today is done. We'll see what else crosses my neurons in the coming days.

Election muse

2008-10-15T15:43:00.003-05:00

So I have been avoiding thinking about the upcoming election... the dog hair piling up in the corner is more interesting to me. Early voting starts October 21 here, and I have pretty much decided to take advantage so I don't get caught up in the huge lines that I am thinking will appear.

The winds of change are blowing strongly across these midwestern plains. I don't really like the options on either side. A ridiculously liberal politician against a ridiculously old man. Sigh. And I guess the older I get, the more centrist I get. I can definitely relate to the "Why can't we all just get along?" sentiment. Why do we see compromise as a sign of weakness? In life, if you acted like that you would never get anything done. Even when things happen that you don't like, you have to find a way to put it in the past and move forward. Who cares how they voted on the war? What are they going to do about it once they get into office? Who cares whose fault it is that the economy is struggling? How are they going to move it forward? You can't move anywhere in Washington without cooperation of the party you ran against in the election. Like most of the country, I am tired of the Congress acting like a bunch of toddlers fighting over who gets to play in the sandbox. We elected you so you could ALL play. So get in there and play nice.

Happy birthday

2008-10-02T14:48:00.005-05:00

Today my dad would have been 71. I'm so glad that the passage of time begins to heal the hurt. His last years were so hard. I think I know the feeling of helplessness that alcoholics have. I hope he has some peace now.

Breathe in deeply

2008-10-02T14:42:00.002-05:00

Fall is in the air. I miss the color filled falls of the northeast, a treat for my eyes. Here in Kansas, there isn't as much for the eye this time of year. But you can't keep out the scent of the changing seasons. When the weather hits the point where you wear shorts and a sweatshirt, breathe deeply. The cool promise of maturity, a vision of the time of rest to come... The rains haven't come yet, and we still need to mow the lawn, but I can smell it. Fall has a foot in the door, and is saying hello to us all.

At the end of the limb

2008-09-22T13:42:00.003-05:00

My recent job search has allowed me to fully embrace the whole "big risk=big reward" experience. While I have not fully realized the reward piece, embarking on a change of direction for my career has led me farther and farther out on the proverbial limb. Trust and patience are things I must experience daily. But the limb sure feels shaky right now. I have the confidence that I am able to excel. Right now I just need someone to take the risk on me, and pull me back onto the more stable part of the branch.

Back to the sticks...

2008-09-11T07:23:00.003-05:00

I have picked up my knitting again in the last couple of days. Finished up a pair of socks for child #3. When those were done I pulled out a sweater I had started in the most gorgeous shade of green alpaca. The back and most of the front pieces were finished. But I had been avoiding it because I had been away from it so long that I was afraid I would never be able to figure out where I had left off on the pattern. I think I mostly figured it out, and it seems that I can fudge the places where I need decrease extra stitches on the neck line so my stitch count ends up where it should be. My goal is to finish the fronts today (about 4" left to go). Then I will only have the sleeves and sewing it together. I'm slightly worried that I don't have enough yarn. So I will knit both sleeves at the same time, and if I need to make it 3/4 length sleeves, so be it.

Tomorrow I must go and do a dreaded deed. My heart has been broken for a couple weeks thinking about it. I know it must be done. So I will go and do it. Sigh... Afterwards, I have made plans to spend time with family and friends, hoping that they will shore up my resolve and get me headed back into life.

The job front is in limbo. I have a really good position where I am one of two finalists. My final interview is done, and now I am waiting for the other candidate to finish. There is an offer of a another job on the table, but it is not as good of a fit, so I am waiting until I hear on the first one. As always, I am cruising the job sites, looking for more potential future employers. I will be glad when this season of my life is behind me.

Today is the anniversary of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. When I remember that, my problems seem so small.

Caught Unawares

2008-09-04T22:30:00.002-05:00

Life has a way of being amusing... While the photograh at the left is less than professional (taken with my cell phone zoomed as far in as possible), I believe you can discern two fellow travelers that joined us briefly for the afternoon walk with the dogs. As it happens, we were being followed unawares by the two deer until Gizmo had to take care of his "business." Gizmo has an unusual habit when we get to that point in the walk. He runs in crazy, tight circles five or six times before he squats. Giz was in his third or fourth turn, and suddenly bolted forward about six feet, and then started circling again. He finally completed the ritual turns, and as he was mid-business, he was looking back over his shoulder doing his high pitch whine. When I turned to look, so did Ginger. Immediately Ginger figured out what was going on and stood watching at attention. Once Ginger was at attention, Gizmo (interrupting his business) joined in the stare-down. Being shy things and suddenly the center of attention, the deer took off from whence they came, white tails flashing. And once the deer were running, the doggie adrenaline was flowing and their demeanor came just short of rabid. Since they had both done their stuff, I cut the walk short and headed home, chuckling at poor Gizmo, who apparently didn't like to be the evening show for the deer.

Midlife fashion

2008-09-04T07:45:00.003-05:00

Oh, a little over a year and a half ago I had a certain body part removed that at my age I no longer need, since it was causing me some painful problems on a regular (monthly) basis. (Not too veiled of a reference, I agree.) Because of the problems I was having, it was a phenomenally great decision. (Not to mention my brilliant surgeon - my recovery was days, not weeks.) But it did induce certain, and unpredictable, changes that women of a certain age invariably endure.

At first, I would be unaware of the event even taking place. It was quite interesting when I was sitting in the stands at a basketball game, and stand up to cheer, and notice the back of my pants were slightly more "humid" than when I had arrived. Nothing too annoying or noticeable. Just a wee bit...damp. As the months have progressed, so has the irregularity of my internal thermostat. It reminds me somewhat of a toddler, finally tall enough to reach a switch or a dial, and can't keep their hands off. Hot, cold, just fine. And the toddler never sleeps. Just play, play, play all day and night with the dial... sigh...

So fashion choices for this season of life are interesting. Especially as I head out to potential employers for interviews. What appears to be nervous moisture on my forehead is really nothing more than a purely hormonal reaction. I really want to wear a jacket to my interviews - being professional and such. I just worry about my favorite little toddler turning the dial as I expound upon the virtues of my work habits and experience, and they'll think I'm trying to pull the wool over their eyes when the sweat starts to bead on my upper lip. And as the weather has turned convincingly towards fall this week, the sleeveless option really isn't much of an option anymore.

So, even though I must stand strategizing in my closet much longer that my sensibilities can stand, the decision to have the offending body part summarily cast off still brings me joy.

Empty-handed

2008-09-03T11:56:00.003-05:00

Taking definitive action invariably has consequences. Hope always looks for the positive. Often times the initial reaction to the action is negative. But much like the ingredient of time and tossing in the waves turns broken glass, tossed uncaring into the ocean into beautiful sea glass, so am I hoping that time, patience and the initial abrasion of my action will eventually turn into beauty. Fortunately I am not alone in this.

On Unemployment

2008-08-28T19:08:00.006-05:00

The weekly reminder that I have still not procured employment arrived in the mailbox today. That itty-bitty check from the unemployment office evokes an interesting mix of relief and humiliation. While it helps buy a few bags of groceries, it's definitely not enough to live on. And with my severance pay running out I am glad I have several good prospects in the queue.

The interviewing process is interesting. With the internet available to research prospective employers, knowing what a company is about (the business side) is fairly easy. What is fun is to ferret out is how you would fit into their personnel puzzle. The kinds of questions the interviewer asks you, who else they bring into the interview, how much they expect you to query them all gives you a little clue about how you would work together. Lots to think about. Keeps me busy in my dreams.

The biggest thing I have to keep in mind is to not lose hope. I tend to obsess a little bit if I don't find five or ten new places to send my resume every day. Obsessing can be a good thing when you something constructive to pick to death. When you are depending on the randomness of pixels flying over the net to take your well-defined qualifications to some faceless potential employer, it can be a little bit nerve wracking when you don't hear anything. Ever. I understand the appeal of employers in putting that wall between their HR department (if it's a large enough company) and the hordes. When you're on this end, though, it occasionally feels like they're telling you to "let them eat cake" when there's no response at all.

So hope. Counting my blessings. All the interviews I have had so far have progressed to second interviews. Several of the companies will go through a third round, and I am optimistic that I will get invited. And there's always the five or ten resumes that I will send out tomorrow.

Truth Matters

2008-08-24T14:35:00.001-05:00

Truth matters.
Lies hurt.

Just because you don't speak the lie doesn't mean you're not lying.

Hitting .750

2008-08-19T21:15:00.004-05:00

If I were a baseball player and got a hit every three out of four at bats, I would be the greatest baseball player of all time. In the midst of every day life, parents should remember that.

The third of our four children left for college this weekend. We deposited #2 last week in Atlanta, and #1 just started her graduate program in Warrensburg. We have one left at home, and all signs are that despite the bumps in the road, he'll make it out successfully as well. If I were a baseball player, I'd go straight to the hall of fame.

People ask me if I have started feeling the "empty nest." Well, sure. But when I had children, I moved a lot of the other things in my life out of the nest for the season in life of raising them. I am transitioning out of the child season, and looking forward to what the next season of life will bring. The possibilities are so exciting, it's sometimes hard to remember feel sad as the current season draws to a close.

So what will it take to be a good hitter in the next phase?

I was watching when...

2008-08-11T07:29:00.004-05:00

My mom always talks about knowing exactly where she was when President John F. Kennedy was assasinated. I think that perhaps I will always remember exactly where I was when the United States men's swimming team won the 4 x 100 freestyle relay at the 2008 Olympics in Beijing. The United States trailed for the majority of the race, and in the last meter, with a Herculean effort, won by .08 seconds, dropping almost four seconds off the world record.

If you haven't seen it, find a video of it. Watching the actual race will be worth your effort. It's truly one of the most exciting finishes to an athletic event that I have ever seen. But then make sure you understand the context.

First, there is the fact that the top five teams all turned in times under world record pace. The top three teams will go home with medals for their efforts. But can you imagine the heartbreak of teams four and five, swimming under world record pace with nothing to show for it in the end? Somehow, telling them that "at least you have the experience of competing in the Olympics", seems a little trite.

Second, there is Michael Phelps, who is attempting to break Mark Spitz's gold medal record by earning 8 gold medals in one Olympics. This was the event where he was most vulnerable to losing that bid. From all reports, he is a driven yet humble athlete who puts himself out at 100% every day. And his hope for his goal is still alive.

Then there is the French relay racer, Alain Bernard, who also is a talented swimmer and is a world record holder in the 100 meter freestyle. But he will probably never be known for that talent. He will always be the one who claimed he and his team could "smash" the Americans in this race, but in the end couldn't deliver.

What about the three American swimmers who swam in the preliminaries, qualifying the team in first position by breaking what was then the world record. The talent pool of American swimmers was so deep that only one of the swimmers (Jones) was able to actually swim in the finals, despite the amazing performance they gave. It is fortunate that all seven of them will be receiving medals. And all seven of them will be able to tell their children and grandchildren that they held a world record.

But my favorite story of this event is the story of Jason Lezak, who swam the final leg. Thirty-two years old, swimming this event for the third time in his third Olympics, had been on the 2000 and 2004 relay teams that had not won gold. Those two teams were the only two teams in over 50 years that had not come home with gold. By the time he dove into the pool last night, he was almost a full body length behind the French swimmer Bernard. He was still behind at the turn. But not wanting to go home without his gold, not wanting to disappoint his team, not wanting to be the reason that Phelps didn't make it to his goal of eight gold medals, he turned in the fastest time for a leg on this relay in history. He had never swum that fast. He probably didn't imagine that he could swim that fast. But he could imagine himself on that top step of the podium. He could imagine the faces of his teammates, and his country, if he didn't swim the race of his life. And he used all his training, all of his 20 years of experience in the pool, all of his heart and soul, and that 32-year-old body to make it happen.

You know, we won't all have the chance to make an impact in so many ways on a world stage. But we can have the same kind of impact with our families, friends, and co-workers. Sacrifice and determination and hard work is all you need. You may not get a gold medal for a reward. You may not even know the impact you have on someone elses life. But there will be an impact. There will be a reward. Never fear. I want that reward. Do you?

Snow in August?

2008-08-10T11:23:00.002-05:00

Ah, the joys of teenagers. We got TP'd by some girls last night. Between my handsome 17-year-old son who has dated several of the girls, and his older sister who coaches the girls in basketball, I think we were doomed when they decided to get together for a team building event. I don't really mind the getting TP'd part. I'm glad that those girls think enough of the two of them to make us a stop on their midnight running around. It's the arguing between the two of them about who is going to clean it up that makes my eyes cross and steam come out my ears. At almost 17 and 20, you would think that I would have given them the skills by this point to be able to settle it in a fair way. But I still get the familiar , "Moooommm.... he/she won't...." I hope they can act more adult out in the world.

At what point do we, if ever, make the transition out of seeing our parents as the arbiters of arguements with our siblings? As much as I love my sister, and think she is a great person now, I don't believe I ever really cared what she was thinking when I was growing up. If she had anything against the way I acted, I certainly didn't give it enough credence to commit it to memory. Certainly the fact that we haven't lived together in 30 years, or even in the same state for that period probably has contributed to the genial feelings I have for her now.

Is it the time heals all wounds theory? I can kind of see that with my children now. My oldest, who had multiple issues as a child, didn't have very good social skills. Her siblings kind of saw her as a creature from Mars on her good days, and spawn of the devil on bad days. Time and distance have mostly removed the horns from her head, but they tend to peek out when they spend more than a few hours together.

Doggieness

2008-08-09T20:53:00.001-05:00

I'm sitting on my rear tonight, watching the men's gymnastic competition on the Olympic coverage. Kind of a snoozer. The women's beach volleyball was much better. Michael Phelps is amazing. And that 41 year old women's swimmer... I have no words to tell you how much I am in awe of her because my chin is on the floor every time I think about her.

I have two dogs, thus the name of the blog. Gizmo and Ginger are both part basenji. Giz is also part lab, and thus he is an old soul. Ginger is part german shepherd. Since she's just over a year, she's a bit of a wild child still, and the instigator. Right now they are sitting crashed on the other couch next to me. They got a trip to the dog park tonight, so I think they're pretty well worn out. Giz is full of old man groans, which is a pretty good sign for him. And Ginger is sucking her tongue in her sleep. I thought only people did that. More groans. I wish I slept that well.

I am currently jobless, having been RIF'd about three weeks ago from the company where I worked. I had some encouraging initial response to my resume, and I thought I did well with the interviews, but didn't close the deal. So now I am weighing my options. Where does God really want me for this next phase of my life? I am thinking about doing some freelance writing. I suppose that part of the reason for starting the blog is to have some credibility in this digital age as a writer. And so it begins.